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Viejo paso de los miembros

For my final entry, this is the actual Valentines Day Card I received from the wife.

ValentinesDayCard.jpg
 
Wow, nice contest!

Here's a Christmas one I use.

During Christmas night Santa goes delivering presents as normal. On the first house, he goes down the chimney and delivers his presents. He finds his milk and cookies, and as he is munching away a little boy shows up.

The boy ask, "Santa! Can you stay!?"

Santa goes:

"Ho! Ho! Ho! Got to go!"
"Have a lot of presents to deliver, you know!"

On the second house, he goes down the chimney and delivers his presents. He finds his milk and cookies, and as he is munching away the parents shows up.

The parents ask, "Santa! Can you stay!?"

Santa goes:

"Ho! Ho! Ho! Got to go!"
"Have a lot of presents to deliver, you know!"

On the third house, he goes down the chimney and delivers his presents. He finds his milk and cookies, and as he is munching away a naked woman shows up.

The naked woman ask, "Santa... Can you stay?"

Santa goes:

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Got to stay!"
"Can't go up the chimney with my dick this way!"
 
Roy R. Frush said:
Allofus123 said:
LOL... trust me when I say my first response was just a nibble. I just glad I didn't hit the send button to what I had originally wrote. LOL.... that would have resulted in a gut hook. :cool:

If you wouldn't have tried so hard on the second cast I'm sure the livewell would have been overflowing. OK.... now its funny! :D
Click to expand...

I gotta admit, you did pretty well for someone who doesn't know me personally. Sam and Anthony knew what was up immediately, but they know my sense of humor. I tend to keep a pretty low profile, so most of the folks here didn't share in that knowledge. I did leave a clue, however! The font I used in those posts was chosen very deliberately. If you know what it's called, my intentions would have been revealed... ;)
Click to expand...

There's a font called Hook, Line and Sinker? :laugh:
Gotta find that one...
 
Well my brothers! As I dust off the cobwebs from myself it is good to be back! :rolleyes:

Thanks to Devin for the invite from retirement! LOL!


Rob
 
Ya leave the door open and look what crawls in...... :sign:
 
Swissy said:
Roy R. Frush said:
Allofus123 said:
LOL... trust me when I say my first response was just a nibble. I just glad I didn't hit the send button to what I had originally wrote. LOL.... that would have resulted in a gut hook. :cool:

If you wouldn't have tried so hard on the second cast I'm sure the livewell would have been overflowing. OK.... now its funny! :D
Click to expand...

I gotta admit, you did pretty well for someone who doesn't know me personally. Sam and Anthony knew what was up immediately, but they know my sense of humor. I tend to keep a pretty low profile, so most of the folks here didn't share in that knowledge. I did leave a clue, however! The font I used in those posts was chosen very deliberately. If you know what it's called, my intentions would have been revealed... ;)
Click to expand...

There's a font called Hook, Line and Sinker? :laugh:
Gotta find that one...
Click to expand...

I'm guessing Comic Sans.
 
I don't envy the judges on this one! Lots of good jokes out there. They'll be beat up and tired by the time the judging is over.

I would recommend a good snack while doing the judging... say some quality, healthy brain food like smoked salmon? Maybe a Alaskan Smoked Porter beer to wash it down with? :whistling: I might know where some can be found...



:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Good luck all... it'll be fun to see who wins!

And BTW - welcome back to all the 'old' members... seen more low member numbers in this thread than ever before! :thumbs:
 
Swissy said:
welcome back to all the 'old' members... seen more low member numbers in this thread than ever before! :thumbs:
Click to expand...



2, 14, 19, 26, 45, 57, 106, 189, 200, 231, 294, 295, 363, 379, 466......:)
 
wk-mang said:
Assman, you don't have to worry about the cigars I'll take ahead of you because I'll take them all and will put a box of Papayos and Tabantillas in the pass for you!
Click to expand...


Joe is before you...:whistling:
 
After clearing the air yesterday about my real intentions with my absurd posts, I had an opportunity to chat with Devin personally. He informed me that he was quite amused by the stunt I pulled, and then floored me when he asked if I’d be interested in joining this pass. I thought to myself, “I have no business participating in a pass with such distinguished folks. All of the participants are some of the earliest members here, and have known one another for years. Wait a minute, he must be setting me up for a joke of his own”! After he assured me that he was being absolutely sincere, with much trepidation, I meekly accepted his most generous invitation.

Imagine my surprise this morning when the FedEx man delivered a package from him! I certainly wasn’t expecting the pass to begin so soon. What an impressive sight to behold! I’m happy to report that the cigars arrived in excellent shape, and all are accounted for. There was one thing I noticed; the cigars in bags 17 and 18 were switched. I swapped them back, and now everything is in order.

Having cigars of this rarity and value in my possession does make me a bit uncomfortable. As such, I’d like to move the pass out of my hands as soon as possible. Without further ado, here are my proposed Puts/Takes:

Takes
2. Dunhill Estupendos '85
5. Don Candido No. 502 70's
15. Davidoff Haut-Brion '85

Puts
26. Joya de Nica Antano Belicoso '70
27. Torano Exodus Toro '59
28. RP Vintage Churchill '92
29. Padron No. 35 '26

If there are no objections to my P/T, I will have this packaged up, along with an updated inventory list, and sent on to Kenny today.

A heartfelt “Thank You” to Devin for allowing me to participate in this most amazing pass! And to be first in line, no less! This was a “once in a lifetime” event for me, and I’ll certainly never forget it.
 
I dunno if I can compete with that creativity but here is a last attempt....


Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them clutches at his chest and collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his phone and calls 911.

He tells the operator what happened and says "I think my friend is dead! What should I do?"
The operator replies in a calm voice "Slow down sir. First, you need to make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"


Thanks Devin for letting those of us outside the pass play!
 
insight said:
I dunno if I can compete with that creativity but here is a last attempt....


Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them clutches at his chest and collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his phone and calls 911.

He tells the operator what happened and says "I think my friend is dead! What should I do?"
The operator replies in a calm voice "Slow down sir. First, you need to make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"


Thanks Devin for letting those of us outside the pass play!
Click to expand...

Your'e kidding right. This is like the third or fourth post for this same joke. :laugh:
 
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