Thank you Gary for posting the picture. It is how I remember him looking when I saw him, minus the uniform though. He is the only one from CP I have actually ever met in person.
I don't know how to express exactly how I feel. Its like I can be happy one moment, then I feel guilty for being that way. I've only had something like this happen to me once, a guy in one of my ffl leagues. Still play it over and over. I was on vacation, and he called me to make a move (I had to make the move for him, something like that). I didn't agree with the move and I busted his balls good for it, even more so I think because I was on vacation, but my memory fades. I got off the phone with him and called him back a little while later, after I cooled off a bit and apologized for being a asshole, and helped him as best I could with his move(s), hung up and everything seemed cool. I'm not sure if I was the last one he spoke with or not, but I got back from vacation like a day later and he was gone.
Still think about that, much more than I probably should.