Thought’s Dad Joke Thread

[drunkfish3]

When does a joke become a dad joke.

When the punchline becomes apparent.

 

[drunkfish3]

why do skeletons stay so calm?

Because nothing gets under their skin.

 

[Thoughts]

I literally walked into a patients’ room the other day with this one:

me, holding the X-ray: “yup, this is what I’m afraid of”

patient: “what?? What is it??”

me: “skeletons...”

*crickets*

me: “but your leg is broken”

 

[drunkfish3]

What did one snowman say to the other?

Can you smell carrots?

 

[kann]

There are two fish in a tank.

One fish says to the other, "I'll drive, you man the gun".

 

[kann]

A guy walks into a doctor's office. The nurse says to him, "I've got a billboard. How about you?".

 

[Undegreed]

Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?

Because if they went forward they'd land in the boat.

 

[drunkfish3]

A guy walks into a doctor's office. The nurse says to him, "I've got a billboard. How about you?".

He says no but I RESPECT THE 99!!!!!

 

[Thoughts]

I just saw this online, and I used to love telling this one.

My buddy was just telling me the other day, "it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a deep hole filled with water."

.....I know he means well.

 

[drunkfish3]

What time did the man go to the dentist?

Tooth hurt-y.

 

[drunkfish3]

What did one eye say to the other?

Between me and you something smells.

 

[drunkfish3]

What is Mozart doing right now?

Decomposing!!!

 

[kann]

Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road?

Because all the dinosaurs are dead. Duh.

 

[Thoughts]

Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road?

Because all the dinosaurs are dead. Duh.

Reminded me of another cringe one, same as yours.

Why couldn't you hear the Pterodactyl pee?

Cause they are all dead....

 

[Thoughts]

What is the opposite of Mr. Hippy?

Mississippi

 

[H. Vachon]

A guy walks into a doctor's office. The nurse says to him, "I've got a billboard. How about you?".

Shots fired!!

 

[drunkfish3]

What do you call someone with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows

 

[Scap]

A guy walks into a doctor's office. The nurse says to him, "I've got a billboard. How about you?".

I don't get this one...

 

[H. Vachon]

I don't get this one...

It’s a long story lol

 

[drunkfish3]

I don't get this one...

Inside joke for us who have been joining in on Saturday virtual herfs.