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Smokyballs

Awesome Brad! Your'e an inspiration!

Seriously! If someone told me I had stage four colon cancer, I'd probably just accept I'm going to die and go through the motions of fighting it. You genuinely got pissed and told cancer I'm going to skull fuck you, you bastard!!!!
 
Hellz to the Yeah!!!
 
I understand there's a green leafy substance that helps with the side effects. Wouldn't hurt to look into it.:D What are they going to do, take away your birthday?

Doc
 
Keep fighting, Brad! You'll kick it's ass in no time.
 
It's amazing how little of that side effect I have had. Anyway, I got this guy...(my oncologist)that can get me,in pill form, THC. I don't need it, don't want it. I am an advocate for the use of it to help cancer patients. It's hard to explain to someone who isn't dealing with cancer why everything and anything should be available to deal with it. The side effects of chemo seem to be worse than the cancer so far (I know it will change). My recent fun side effect is an acne rash that has covered my head and upper torso. I had an bad day where I got physically sick. When you throw up the muscles in your face pull. Generally, you are too busy being sick to notice it. When I did the pustules popped and opened on my face. So, not only am I puking my guts out, my face is pouring blood out of several spots. My 10 year old son is the only one home with me (the wife is with my eldest at a band competition an hour and a half away). So, I am trying to clean myself up and not scare him and the diarrhea starts. Worse day I have had, but the only day I have had like it. The rash has started to slowly go away with ointment. They say it's a good sign that the drug is working. I will find out Monday how well.
 
Brad - keep it up man! I really enjoy reading the updates on FB, but the above story is one that you have to look back on now and laugh. Not much can get worse than that, from a daily perspective, unless I'm just naive to the entire process.

Regardless, you're an inspiration. We'll be in KC again this January, for a dance competition. If you're up for it then, we need to get together, if I'm able.
 
I can respect your feelings about marijuana, but the stuff your oncologist is pedaling, Marinol, is worthless.

Doc
 
It may be. I don't need it. Most things from what I have heard are worthless if it's that bad. I have family in Colorado if I need it. I have friends who I have worked with that have it if I need it. Access isn't a problem, the fact that it's illegal for people who need it is. Most oncologist have a contact for their patients ( they feel out the patient on the subject when it gets really bad for them). I, once again, have been extremely lucky on this front. I would if it came down to it.
 
jfields said:
Awesome Brad! Your'e an inspiration!

Seriously! If someone told me I had stage four colon cancer, I'd probably just accept I'm going to die and go through the motions of fighting it. You genuinely got pissed and told cancer I'm going to skull fuck you, you bastard!!!!
Click to expand...
Accepting your own mortality is the hardest thing you will ever do. You would fight with every fiber of your being when you understand what you are really losing. I'm not fighting for me. I'm fighting for my time with them, what memories in life that I might not get to be part of. What I will be taking from my family and friends by giving up is why I fight. The special moments in my children's lives that I so much want to be a part of. The fact that they have a dad. I have been lucky to have had mine through everything in my life. I can't imagine not having one. This will more than likely kill me. I'm not ready to give in to that fact until my quality of life isn't worth the fight. I will not die without the fight, neither would you.
 
Smokyballs said:
Accepting your own mortality is the hardest thing you will ever do. You would fight with every fiber of your being when you understand what you are really losing. I'm not fighting for me. I'm fighting for my time with them, what memories in life that I might not get to be part of. What I will be taking from my family and friends by giving up is why I fight. The special moments in my children's lives that I so much want to be a part of. The fact that they have a dad. I have been lucky to have had mine through everything in my life. I can't imagine not having one. This will more than likely kill me. I'm not ready to give in to that fact until my quality of life isn't worth the fight. I will not die without the fight, neither would you.
Click to expand...

This right here for the Damn WIN!!!!!

Worse comes to worse, you also got some friends that live in Colorado.....I am sure someone knows how to turn a CC into a "blunt"......just saying
 
Smokyballs said:
Accepting your own mortality is the hardest thing you will ever do. You would fight with every fiber of your being when you understand what you are really losing. I'm not fighting for me. I'm fighting for my time with them, what memories in life that I might not get to be part of. What I will be taking from my family and friends by giving up is why I fight. The special moments in my children's lives that I so much want to be a part of. The fact that they have a dad. I have been lucky to have had mine through everything in my life. I can't imagine not having one. This will more than likely kill me. I'm not ready to give in to that fact until my quality of life isn't worth the fight. I will not die without the fight, neither would you.
Click to expand...

This resonates. I can't tell you how much this resonates. I know you don't want the burden of being an "inspiration" to anyone; you just want to live your life the way you need to for yourself. However, your attitude and outlook certainly IS an inspiration for others, no matter whether they are going through a strained muscle, missing parts, or even a battle with cancer, themselves. If it wasn't such a personal message, I'd probably quote and sig this just so I can read it every time I post. Amazing attitude and outlook, brother. Keep it up for your family. Never stop fighting. You help people more than you know or would care to accept. I guarantee it. Great news to see on here...
 
Sitting, waiting for my chemo. The scan shows my tumors are still shrinking. My cancer markers are as low as I have had at 4.3. We are going to have 4 more treatments then reevaluation. Great, great news!
 
My troubles pale in comparison. You gotta get better so I can go back to feeling like shit.
 
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