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"Dress Like a Habanos Insider" Contest!

??? Okay guys lets go here is our chance to drive Wilkey crazy. :p


:cool: Every CP’er who posts here.
:) Should limerick without any fear.
:whistling: His task more severe,will drive Wilkey to tear.
??? He’ll wish he could disappear for a year.
:(
 
There once was a man named geldor
His rhymes well they really did smelldor
Thought he was so good
Talking tough in the hood
Don't give up your day job you welder*






* No offence to actual welders, but this was a really weak attempt by me to try and rhyme "geldor"

I'll have to give ya that one, it was a pretty weak attemp. :sign:

I did a Google on 'smelldor' and only got 3 hits. I call foul, it's not a real word. :whistling:
 
There once was a guy named Zee..bra
Who wanted to compete with you all
He thought he would be
Able to run with Moki
But alas, he couldn't even crawl

*****
Zeeeb, all in fun. ;)
Your name was just too easy to rhyme. :whistling:

But you didn't rhyme Zeebra with anything! :sign:

Okay, how 'bout this...


There once was a CPer named Zeebra,
He was a very nice guy for a Libra.
Cubans he wanted to try
So a glass top box he did buy,
Alas the bright yellow bands read “COHIBRA”



Couldn't believe my luck that you were actually a Libra...
 
Here's one of my own, just for fun.

There once was a smoker named B.B.S.
whose cigar choosing habits were devious
he'd reach into your coolerdor
and toss the cigars 'pon the floor
while sporting a grin most mischievious
 
Xikar in hand, my bourbon is gone
reach in humidor find a good one
home from night school
A BBF makes me drool
and Monday Night Football is ON!
 
There is a cat from Conneticut
Well-versed in grammarian etiquette
If you post like a fool
He'll take you to school
And CP will be better because of it
 
There once was a lad named Bill.
He made it from Hope to Capital Hill.
He took his cigar,
Thrilled Monica behind the bar,
That was the end of ole Bill. :p
 
--Number One--

There once was a man from Havana
Who lived in a nice little cabana
He had a huge stick
That was oily and slick
And if you asked him you take a puff on it


--Number Two--
There once was a smoke roller
Who used to smoke the fat bowler
He dropped the grass
And sold his stash
Then said, "Man this is only tabacola"


--Number Three--
There once was a man from Nicaragua
His leaf was so strong you could holla
He rolled it up tight
And gave it a light
For he crafted the finest vitola
 
A vendor in Canada has a steal
50 Lusitanias -- for real
a cab I can't do solo
So PM me tomorrow
a group buy order is ideal.

Hillbilly Steaks may be inbred
A box of Sharks was his thread
St Peter will refuse his coffer
So Satan will offer
Acids and turds instead
 
I'm not qualified either, but the brain needed a jog.

There once was a man that was poor.
A free shirt, he did not care for.
Knowledge, he's not too keen.
Cigars, he does not feen.

Then what shall you send to his door?

:rolleyes:

"Give it to me", says he,
"Give it to me if it's free."
"I can't have enough."
"Give me more stuff."

"Next time, times three!"

:whistling:
 
There once was a man from Delaware
Who blew loads on film with this fella there
When it was quiet on the set
This man would get wet
And put his moontrance out on his underwear

ya ya ya yaaaaa.... if you like that you're a sick mother f'er!
 
There he sat with a Vegas Robainas
The wrapper was silky not veinous
Toasted the foot
Between the lips it was put
Ahh.... a flavor quite far from heinous


CP is a hell of a place
Just reading puts a smile on my face
I do not post much
My cigar knowledge is such
That my input would likely disgrace


My local guy really sucks balls
Has nothing but crap wall to wall
I ask him for Opus
He looks up, tries to focus
Says "East coast cigar!" then he falls

(True story actually. He fell right on his ass when I asked him. I think he slipped on something as he was up walking around, but it was funny as hell. He wasn't hurt, just embarassed.)


Stick around, don't be an asshat
Never cross Neal or the Cat
They'll smackdown the bitches
Some will mess in their britches
While "read more and post less" could fix that


I made a trade with a fellow CPer
A blind fiver from each would appear
The postman rang twice
The 10 pack was quite nice
I guess the terms of the deal weren't quite clear


Bombs flying around without warning
It's a lot like Halloween corning
Cannot prepare for attacks
Defense systems are lax
Afraid to check the mail in the morning


Oh what a wonderful smell
This one is blended quite well
Smells quite like the barnyard
Resisting is so hard
Habanos: so much heaven with hell

(Alright, I'm done)
 
Dang, Bastige. Nice job kickin' out the limerix!

Oh, BTW, Moki is one sick sonuva biatch! Yikes!

Wilkey
 
I'm no poet...comedy prose is really my game...

Cohibas are pricey and rare
Spark one, and members here stare
Check out the cap.
Not tripled..it's crap!
No wonder it tastes like wet hair!
 
Here lies the butt of a Grenadier
It dieth while pared with cold small beer
A bad stogie is ne’er forgot
Even if it tasted like bad pot
It will haunt me forever I fear


With thanks to Bill W.
 
Geldor is having waaay too much fun with this. ;)

Couple of nice ones there, Stew. :thumbs:

Wilkey

It's either this or I actually do some work. Tough decision. :whistling:


You all know of Stewa070 of course
He'll poke fun of you without showing remorse
He said he could hang
With the big dogs he claimed
But he couldn't get himself off the porch

Nobody is safe I tell ya. :sign:

We all know of Geldor's great zings
His name comes from Lord of the Rings?
But he digs Harry Potter
Which makes him fair fodder
For all of my jokes about queens!

It's on like Donkey Kong, Chief! ;)
 
Habanas in most peoples eyes
Are the highly sought after prize
To help with their fame
The myth it does claim
Are rolled by young vigins on their thighs

:p
 
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