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Coming your way tomorrow enjoy 9405530109355082649323

SANTA RECON! St. Nick's evil twin 9405 5301 0935 6133 70 Incoming

If you can't figure out my secret identity, Jon, there's just no hope for you. It may not be quite as obvious as that dope Superman, who just puts on some nerdy glasses and thinks no one will recognize him, but it's not really too far off of that, either. I bet if you looked at the tracking, and...

Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas, Ron. Enjoy some s'mores tonight with the fam. And burn the marshmallows right. Once you go black, you never go back. 😉😘

My elves informed me that the package was delivered at 10 this morning. Merry Christmas Mr. Parker!

Ol’ Santa talked to the man in brown, and he said to be on the lookout for him on Thursday!

Your survey has been reviewed and approved. Apparently you are now entitled to a prize, even the government hands out participation awards these days. Merry Christmas to you and your family! Tracking number 9534613459294351428487

Alrighty @Acclaym, It looks like I have checked all of your references (including the cats) and the stories collab. To celebrate your arrival on the NICE LIST, I had my best cigar elves pull a couple of things together. You'll need to see if they "wired" it all up right. Here is a picture...

Ho ho ho! The reindeer just left the runway. Merry Christmas! 92346903470167300066168601

https://tools.usps.com/go/TrackConfirmAction?qtc_tLabels1=9505506616864351796389 https://tools.usps.com/go/TrackConfirmAction?qtc_tLabels1=9505506616864351796402

Alrighty then, package is on the sleigh. ETA is the 19th at 8 pm. Just checked in (12/18) and we're still on schedule!

word to ya mutha

Ok Chester, i did some research, and you’ve been pretty good, but in looking at your internet history, saw a few nekkid midget volleyball searches, WTH?!?! But, hey, i like nekkid midgets too, though don’t tell HR, knomesayn? Sorry for the delay, Santa had a lot of non Christmas business travel...

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Look out William! Santa is on his way!! 9405503699300732356849

Sorry Santa just saw this but was waiting on some item anyway. Package is scheduled to ship tomorrow morning but if you need me to hold it till you get back let me know when you will return.

Well, Jon, I'm sorry to say the elves outsourced part of the gift and the dolts at USPS have cemented their position on the naughty list by losing track of it, so your lovely wife's share will be coming separately, and later. But the rest of the stuff is heading out tomorrow, and unless the...

Unfortunately, your treats are in the air as we speak. If you can clear up what you are seeking, I will make a note for next year…

HOHOHO elves are packing the slay and your packages will be out without delay