Johnny B
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2017
- Messages
- 1,314
So I've typed up and deleted at least two posts laying out some pretty personal things and thought to myself that the timing wasn't right. Or that I didn't want to be thrown a pity party, but after getting a text message from my soon-to-be-ex wife telling me that there's a package at the house with my name on it - I figure now is as good of a time as any to share what's been going on in my life recently.
The package in question was from Mississippi and at first glance, I started thinking, "Who do I know from MS?" For some reason I thought I remembered reading that @Thoughts was from MS, but the name on the package didn't look familiar. (Oh and if you're still hung up on the soon-to-be ex wife comment, I'll expand on that in a moment) Inside the package, there were two of my favorite sticks and a note, "...checking to make sure you're still alive."
Truth be told, I've been teetering a little bit on that very idea. Let me be clear, I am a Christian and suicide would never be an option, but I have to tell ya, it's definitely been on my mind. You, see - for the better part of two years (keep in mind, I've been married since 4/13/17) I've endured things that no spouse should ever have to endure. Be it physical abuse, emotional and verbal abuse to downright manipulating my children into thinking I'm a bad parent. Like I said, I shouldered the burden for the better part of two years. I tried shepherding my wife, I bent over backwards to try to make peace in the house, to no avail. Long story short, when the way I was being treating started having an impact on my relationship with my daughters I knew I needed to make a life altering decision for everyone involved.
That's when I decided to move out.
I made that decision in April and have kind of been in a fog ever since. It's not easy, as a man to admit that he has been physically abused by his wife. And even though I know that what I'm doing is what is best for all of us, it's still hard. I have had some pretty rough days and will probably continue to have more, but I have to be honest - the package I got today couldn't have came at a better time.
I know that I've only been around for a short time, but some of you guys have become like family to me. And Thoughts - you thinking enough of me to send me some love means more than words can ever say. Thank you.
The package in question was from Mississippi and at first glance, I started thinking, "Who do I know from MS?" For some reason I thought I remembered reading that @Thoughts was from MS, but the name on the package didn't look familiar. (Oh and if you're still hung up on the soon-to-be ex wife comment, I'll expand on that in a moment) Inside the package, there were two of my favorite sticks and a note, "...checking to make sure you're still alive."
Truth be told, I've been teetering a little bit on that very idea. Let me be clear, I am a Christian and suicide would never be an option, but I have to tell ya, it's definitely been on my mind. You, see - for the better part of two years (keep in mind, I've been married since 4/13/17) I've endured things that no spouse should ever have to endure. Be it physical abuse, emotional and verbal abuse to downright manipulating my children into thinking I'm a bad parent. Like I said, I shouldered the burden for the better part of two years. I tried shepherding my wife, I bent over backwards to try to make peace in the house, to no avail. Long story short, when the way I was being treating started having an impact on my relationship with my daughters I knew I needed to make a life altering decision for everyone involved.
That's when I decided to move out.
I made that decision in April and have kind of been in a fog ever since. It's not easy, as a man to admit that he has been physically abused by his wife. And even though I know that what I'm doing is what is best for all of us, it's still hard. I have had some pretty rough days and will probably continue to have more, but I have to be honest - the package I got today couldn't have came at a better time.
I know that I've only been around for a short time, but some of you guys have become like family to me. And Thoughts - you thinking enough of me to send me some love means more than words can ever say. Thank you.
