Cigar Ho's

[SamClemmons]

Give me your tired, your poor, your punk assed biatches...

I've got a bunch of cigars I'm never gonna smoke. Some I bought a few years ago and others were sent to me by well meaning but misguided souls for one reason or another. Most of these have at least a couple years on 'em, a couple with minor damage... yada yada yada

Tell me why I should send them to you and hopefully AVB will decide who is worthy. I'll be sending out a couple packages.

NO PM's. I don't like you people.

NA

 

[AVB]

Just to give you a hint: Sam likes cigar porno peotry. Cum up with some and you'll be a sure winner.

 

[tone-ny]

I'm not interested in the cigars, but like the ho part. Riddle me this " Just cause you dance go go don't mean you a ho no no". Name the the singer of this mega classic line and I'll add some rockets to the cause. Keeping the Ho part real.

NA I hope you don't mind.

 

[gibu]

I think you should find some deserving serviceman to box them up and ship them off to.

 

[Matt R]

What gibu said... need an addy, LMK, I have a guy in Iraq I've been sending stuff to.

 

[PuroBrat]

Like the contest idea Neal, and like it or not, You are a true BOTL. Very cool.

Oh, and Tone-ny: "Perfect Gentlemen" from the self titled album, Slightly Stoopid

 

[SamClemmons]

Gibu and Matty -

Tell me why and maybe AVB will pick you. That's the rule.

NA

 

[tone-ny]

Agree with Gibu about deserving military members. PB right song wrong album.

 

[PuroBrat]

PB right song wrong album.

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Oops, sorry, the Album is titled..Everything You Need


However, the rules were stated as..

Name the the singer of this mega classic line and I'll add some rockets to the cause.

So I think I did that, eh? :laugh:

 

[PuroBrat]

And here is why I think AVB should pick ME:

Sam said...

Give me your tired, your poor, your punk assed biatches...

Enough said? :laugh:

 

[Matt R]

OK, AVB should pick my kid to send the smokes to because he's risking his life and the life of his servicemen on a daily basis. And, he's doing it so that people like us can sit around on our lazy asses typing on cigar bulletin boards and picking our noses. He should also be picked because if he's not, I'll send him over to all of your houses with his service revolver and an M-16, when he returns home!

 

[PuroBrat]

Ain't fair Matt, playing the Patriotic Card. How am I supposed to compete with that :angry2:

I am certainly much less deserving than one of our country's finest. :thumbs:

 

[sir-smokes-a-lot]

two parter here:

one, you should send some to me. why? why not? If you send them, will promise to smoke each and every one, then write reviews on them in the Review thread.

two, there are many servicemen/women in Iraq and other places who could use a few cigars. Now yes, there have been posts on many boards to send cigars there[including here], and yes, they do get paid to be there.
But, it's more of the prinicple. Someone from back home in the states, doing more than just buying a yellow ribbon sticker for their car [and from what I hear a bunch of the sticker ones are scams anyway ...], telling one of their countrymen "Thank You". That, wether or not I believe in this war and you should/shouldn't be here, I support you and your fight for us. Your fight and survival to keep alive the ideals that a country and its people have a right to be free. Free from tyranny and oppression. Free to make choices, to not run and hide at night. So that they can feel safe going to the polls and casting a vote. Maybe they don't all like us, but as a great man once said, "I may not agree with what you say, but I will fight to the death for your right to say it."

okay, enough talking for me ... just my $0.02. :thumbs:

 

[sir-smokes-a-lot]

oh yeah, and Matt's M-16 is a good one too!

:laugh:

 

[Matt R]

If you send 'em to sir-smokes-a-lot, he'll sit in his circle jerk and share them with his buddies..... (he's the homo woth the goofy smile on his face.. right before he almost blew chunks...(chunks is the guy next to him).

 

[SFG75]

Ain't fair Matt, playing the Patriotic Card.

-My god Puro, you sound like a democrat.














(Lest anyone be offended, I am a democrat, and a county chairman to boot, so stick it)

 

[AVB]

You must be talking to somebody else, he'll need a few friends to come and play with me. :sign: :sign:

OK, AVB should pick my kid to send the smokes to because he's risking his life and the life of his servicemen on a daily basis. And, he's doing it so that people like us can sit around on our lazy asses typing on cigar bulletin boards and picking our noses. He should also be picked because if he's not, I'll send him over to all of your houses with his service revolver and an M-16, when he returns home!

[snapback]158405[/snapback]​

 

[hudsonvalley]

I would like to increase my supply of cigars for several reasons. First of all a well aged, well stored cigar needs to be appreciated. I believe I can do that. A good cigar is like poetry. It moves along at a measured pace, unhurried in it's mission. All the while it is filling it's recipient and those lucky enough to be within the fragrance of it's billows with that subtle pleasure that brings life one of it's few unsullied joys.

There is no need for companionship, no need for small talk or conversation of any kind when enjoying a good cigar. Yet both can be enhanced by the waft of these burning leaves, this tropical foliage. It is as if the warmth of the equatorial sun is stored within them to be released as the warmth of joy upon the soul.

A cigar may be used to celebrate and heighten life's victories. A small thing such as a sports win, or a great thing such as a new birth or wedding day. And all the other moments of achievment.

And like many of nature's medicines a cigar can cure many small ills. You can smoke a cigar to grieve a loved one's passing, to find solace in the midst of one of life's many inevitable sorrows and disappointments both great and small.

For all these reasons, and many more, I find in life more moments to bring fire to this leaf than my humidor has riches. That's why I never turn away the gift of a Brother of the Leaf.


(If I win send them to our boys over there)

 

[sir-smokes-a-lot]

Oh Man, that pic is awesome!
Can't believe you had one [from the power-herf at the MN Make-a-Wish Herf last year].

Can't blame me tho, had to smoke that Sinatra as fast as poss.! [think it was something like under a minute?] Got in 2nd place, lost by about a second or two, his hand shot up first. And, yes, did blow chunks afterwards.

 

[stevehawk]

Sam likes cigar porno peotry.

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Not the best poetry I've ever written, but off the cuff, here are a couple of limericks that might fill the bill:

#1

A cuban-smoking whore with some class.
Had a rude-as-hell client named Bass.
Bass shouted, “Spank me now, please!”
And leaned over her knees
But all he got was a RASS up his ass.

#2 (my favorite)

There once was a girl from Belize
For a cigar, she would drop to her knees
When Sam Clemmons said “Do it!”
The girl got right down to it.
But the next day she was covered in fleas.