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Kann

Secret Santa

CEO, North Pole Inc.
Joined
Nov 25, 2002
Messages
5,022
Humpty Dumpty sat in a chair. Humpty Dumpty had a big scare. All of the King's horse men, and all of the King's Danish Nurses managed to put Nicholas back together again. I'm on a roll, lets do another one! Hickory dickory dock, the @kann ran up the clock. The clock struct 4. Nicholas hit the floor. Hickory dickory dock. Hahahaha! Ok, ok, one more! Nick and Jill went up a hill to fetch a pail of water. Nick feel down, and broke his humorous, and Jill came tumbling after! @kann, you are CP's own nursery rhyme. Thank you for your sacrifice. Ok, now onto the serious matter at hand- how you ended up on the nice list. How did that happen? Well, it is what it is. What is on your list? A hot-rod wheel chair? Flowers for your saint of a wife? A private Jonas Brothers concert for your girls? A dog who kills snakes? Tell Santa what you want so that we can do this right- I mean, finally getting on the Nice List only comes around once in a pandemic for your type. Sorry, not sorry.
 
Nick could use a little luck I think. Also something that vibrates in case he gets stuck in the bedroom alone for 6 weeks
 
Hi, Santa! I'm glad I could sacrifice my health (physical and mental) for the good of CP and our v-herf this year. If the pandemic has brought us nothing else of good, I hope this is looked upon as a beacon of light in the darkness (because it's always the middle of the night here during the v-herf). Now, on to the meat 'n taters of the questions:

First, I could probably use some bubble wrap. Lots of it. Apparently I'm fragile.

My two ladies here are 13 and, uhhh... 25. Yeah. She's 25. The youngest is a teenage girl, so who the fuck knows what she likes right now, never mind by Christmas morning! She's is always borrowing my hoodies and long sleeves, so she my appreciate something local to where you are. I wear a med/lrg in upper body clothing, if that helps there. My mid-20s wife is even harder to buy for. I still don't know what *I* am going to get her for Christmas. Your guess is as good as mine, there. Maybe a new husband?

I'm sure you have Enzo on the "good boy" list, of course. Little dude likes squeaky balls that he can chase around and then bury outside. That's if they are still squeaking 30 seconds after he gets his teeth on them.

As for moi... I have an affinity for all things H. Upmann, but I do enjoy all manner of Cuban cigars, of course. However, (strange as it may seem) I have a harder time getting NCs over here in Dutchland. Anything Tat, Illusione, Hemingway/Don Carlos/Anejo, My Father, trad Drew Estate/Liga offerings, Crowned Heads, among many others really light my fire. I'm not hard to please, and after such a long layoff, I'm just happy to be smoking any sort of cigars right now!

I hope you have a great holiday season, you fat fuuuuhhhhh....uhhhh... my friend!

*EDIT*. Oh yeah, I'm a huge IndyCar and Formula 1 fan, if that helps any. I love anything Ferrari!
 
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Treat him right, Santa. He has been stuck in a room for a month,. Maybe some sunglasses until his eyes adjust to the bright light again!
 
Ok, ok. So let me know if I'm correct in my understanding of this:
-Wife is on the Good list- primarily because someone reliable needs to be available to get you to the Emergency Room for your annual mishap. Cannpt have her "getting to you later".
Daughters are always on the Good List, until they start having Boy Friends. Luckily Covid has moved many a teenage female back on the Good List this year.
Now the dog. I'm confused on this one. Wasn't he the reason for this years ER trip? Are you sure he isn't like a Sleep Cell agent for SPECTRE, or Cobra or KAOS? I also heard a story that he planted a stick or something in your back yard and convinced you that it was a snake that was going to eat you? Is that right? I don't know if i believe that, because it seams that something recreational drugs are for and your near Amsterdam, right? I have my suspicions, is all I will say.
Ok, and you, or Moi as you say- my you have gone Native. Maybe I should just drop off a box full of SPAM and sand to get you back in the Aloha state of mind. You want a nonCuban cigars, while you live in place where Cubans are plentiful? How ironic that the Forbidden Fruit is now nonCubans. I would think that @sigsid would slap you for that request. I'm not sure if I should send you Gurkhas as punishment for such blasphemy or grant your wish with those power house NC's you asked for which will knock back on your ass? What a conundrum.
 
That about sums it up, Santa. Doggo is always on the Good Boy list, though, even when he's not. When I finally end up a quadriplegic, it will probably be because of him. But, how can you stay mad at a face like this...?

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He is almost ready to become like the Full Metal Alchemist, has room for Automail already. Treat him nice Santa and give him currently updates on shops that are closed during the Corona times.
 
I was told of some travel for you which I may need to coordinate my delivery around. Is this right? I would hate to have your gifts dropped off right after you left.
 
I was told of some travel for you which I may need to coordinate my delivery around. Is this right? I would hate to have your gifts dropped off right after you left.

Ah, good call, Santa. I will be out of town from 19-27 of this month. Unless you get it on the sleigh very early next week, you are probably better off waiting until a bit closer to your big night. Figure 10 days +/- to get here.
 
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