I've got THOUGHTS

[Secret Santa]

You dirty bastard, this dirty Santa has your name. You'll be needing to let me know what size buttplug you need, otherwise I will assume and it will NOT make an ASS out of me, but probably will you. I think cigars are a filthy habit, so you better let me know what else, besides anal, that you are into.

 

[cabaiguan juan]

He needs soap.

 

[drunkfish3]

He can never have enough rubber gloves and lub

 

[CBoukal]

Santa, Be nice to this guy. He lived in an Van down by the river for quite a while this fall so he deserves some RnR. I honestly thought Anal beads were his jam but you see everything so maybe he is lying to us.

 

[Thoughts]

Well I’m not entirely sure what all you’ve heard Santa, but these guys are pretty close to spot on. Outside of an enema bag, other things like video game related items work, or I’m in need of a cigar nub holder, my cheeks have been burned too many times and it’s not doing it for the masochist in me anymore. I also have little children, 3 of them under 7, so any type of sedative you could provide would be greatly appreciated.

 

[CigSid]

Take care of Brad Santa, he is definitely one of the good ones...

 

[ConDaddy]

If you take care of Brad you may just get lucky enough to ride his swing.

 

[Tall Paul]

Brad’s a great guy Santa take care of him!

 

[kann]

 

[cabaiguan juan]

@kann your wife is going to see this on your browser history- for better or for worse.

 

[PaulTra]

View attachment 36355

That thing better have wifi!


If so..... Group buy?

 

[ConDaddy]

Santa, maybe you can have one of your elves hook this up to his airpods? For those moments when he hasn't cleaned up after himself and his wife needs to have a talk. While your at it I might need one of these as well on my end.

 

[CBoukal]

Love that!!!

 

[modo22]

Brad is a good kind hearted dude! He is a strong supporter of Cell Phone Diners.

Take care of him!!

 

[kann]

Brad is a good kind hearted dude! He is a strong supporter of Cell Phone Diners.

Take care of him!!

Hey, gotta support local in these trying times!

He might also appreciate a monogrammed dish towel.

 

[CigSid]

His wife could use a megaphone so she doesn’t have to strain her voice when she is yelling at him

 

[modo22]

Take care of him!!

Santa,
Forget what I said earlier...

 

[Thoughts]

His wife could use a megaphone so she doesn’t have to strain her voice when she is yelling at him

My wife has two main complaints about me:

One. I don’t listen
And something else

 

[cody5thou]

He definitely needs to be on the naughty list.

 

[H. Vachon]

Dear Santa, please get this man a new billboard. He was a lot cooler when he was famous But for real, he’s an awesome dude and he was my first real friend here on CP. Bring him something special!

PS: Just leave the gifts on the mantle. This is not a house you want to be bending over in.