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HO HO HOOOOO!!! C'MERE H.Vachon

Secret Santa

Secret Santa

CEO, North Pole Inc.
Joined
Nov 25, 2002
Messages
5,022
Well well we'll. Now be a good boy and put out that Gurkha @H. Vachon and come sit on Santa's lap. I'm not even going to ask if you have been naughty or nice. We all know you're barely out of high school and yet all you do is smoke cigars and drink. Tsk tsk. Also on the list, you are destroying the backs of countless USPS workers with your antics. And finally! Your welds. That is deserving of coal right there, but being you are from a state shaped like a mitten you would love some coal to keep you warm, and that's why all you'll get is a half smoked Gurkhas. Now that is out of the way let's talk about your sweet wife and what does she like? When I am on your ruuf come Christmas eve if you leave out some real cigars and a glass of Faygo I am get something from the list you provide.
 
I think you got it Santa, he's a great bother but he does lean towards Gurkha and Faygo for sure. He has started to come around to the finer things in life but he isn't there yet. Hit him in the teeth with quality bourbon!!!
 
Damn Santa, you funny! That was all spot on 🤣 Most of all being my sweet wife, Jessica. Most of y’all know how she feels about cigars, but she still lets me sit on the herf for 4-6 hours every weekend. She da real MVP. She likes candles, ornaments (this time of year) and in general, anything sparkly lol.

As for me, getting half smoked Gurkhas would be a blessing.... In the sense that I know one of you chumps had to smoke the first half 🤣🤣🤣 Also, maybe a book about Phonetics. You know, so I can say ROOF the way god intended (like a southerner!)

Cheers Santa!

PS: What kind of Faygo do you like? If you don’t know all the options, google it and get back to me 😉
 
You better get your shit straight and act right! Santa is onto you! 😮

Seriously though Santa, be kind to Hayden. He's a great brother.
 
HO! HO! HOOOO!!! I've been plowing away the snow and Mrs Clause, but the elves are hard at work making your gifts. Now back to shoveling all this snow!!!
 
HO! HO! HO OOOOO!!!! I'm snowed in!! But thankfully for you I offered a USPS delivery person some fine cigars and bourbon. After getting his ass good and drunk he offered to take you package. Don't you worry your precious Gurkhas are safe! Now back to whipping elves and spanking Mrs Clause!!!

In his drunken ramblings the USPS kept saying these numbers. They may mean something to you.
9505514536660346371438
 
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