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*Contest* Pick Up Lines - the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

"Was your daddy a thief becuase he stole the twinkle from the stars and put it in your eyes"

"Was your daddy a baker, 'cuz you got some nice buns"

"Aren't you tired from running through my mind all day"

"Did it hurt, When you fell from Heaven. Did it Hurt"

One that worked out for a couple of months in college

"Look I know I am hung over, but is that even English"

her response "Your in French Lit. dumb a$$."

Me "Cool wake me up if I start snoring"
 
Slap: "Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?"

Love of my life: "Hi." (my Katy votes for this one...it worked for her!) :love:

Derek

*edit to underline
 
Bahaha, my girl thinks it's funny when I randomly give her a new line when we go out, so I have a ton of them

"I may not be Fred Flintstone but I can make your bed rock"

"Do you have any Polish in you? Do you want some?"

The ever classic "Nice Shoes, wanna f*ck?"

"Is that top felt? Do you want it to be?"

"I just realized this, but you look a lot like my next girlfriend"

Oh for when I'm back in NH, this one always gets em "Hey, that sure is a pretty tooth"
 
A friend of a friend would work the bar in the UK with "Fancy a shag?" If you play the percentages it works. Say 1/200 girls say yes, all you have to do is ask enough.

The one that worked for my wife was " Hey, aren't you in that class?". It was asked between classes we shared. But "Who are you?" Also worked in the past.
 
"You want to see a trick I learned in prison?"

And one my buddy used that actually worked:
"If I was a lesbian, I would want you as my girlfried."
 
You want to go grab a pizza and f*ck?

Most girls will slap or go eww...

You reply:
What?!?!? You don't like pizza?
 
The worst :
Walk up to girl lean over and wisper in her ear
























"I have a gun get in my car"
works all the time
hahahahahahahahaha
 
"I'm not as good as I once was but, for you, I could be as good once as I ever was"

or

If you are Italian and she is clearly not........

"Excuse me but do you have some Italian in you?" when she says "no" you say "would you like to?"
 
You walk up to a group of women at the bar and say "Alright, I'm going to have sex with you, you, and you!" as you point to the three most attractive ones--make sure you don't point at all of them, because that's lame and besides, it diminishes the perception that you're a hot commodity. As they try to gather themselves, you clap your hands and ask loudly, "So who's first?"
 
Damn. I have so many of them ...

Sorry, I have nothing really sweet and nice to say.. But these are funny as hell. Enjoy !!


1) If you was a tree 'n I were a squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

2) Yer face reminds me of a wrench: every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

3) Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special.
 
I have used this one a few times as an ice breaker...


"Wow, I almost wore that dress myself... imagine how embarrassing that would have been for us both... And it compliments you so much better than me... Here's to making the right decision tonight..."

For whatever reason, it comes off as witty, not at all cliched', laid back, and inviting... now that you're in, don't blow it with a hook up line...
 
What's up mami? I can buy you a pink Lexus with teddy bear rims...

Never works all the time
 
My Favorite:

"Do you have a Keg in your pants, Cuz I wanna tap that ass"
 
Get me slapped: *very polite voice “Excuse me Miss, Are you by chance going to be walking to your car alone later on?”

Funny: If you were a booger, I’d pick you first!
 
On our first date, I asked her if she wanted to skip the awkward boyfriend/girlfriend phase and just get married in the morning. She agreed, stayed the night and moved in the next day while I was at work. Been 13 years last July.

Your mileage may vary!

Trey
 
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