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Guess what!? Yeah, you've got a big long string of numbers coming your way... 9405503699300189300488 You've got a fun guessing game ahead of you, you can place things in order of yellowest wrapper first, or by the number of years since you've last even seen mention of a few of these smokes...

HO HO HO. My elves are on the case and a package is headed to your far away lands. Inside you will find an item from Santa's old stomping grounds, an item from Santa's new stomping grounds, and items I thought may be hard to find being so far away from home. 1ZA994R36708811369 💘 Saint Nick

On its way, Chester! It's going to be painfully obvious who it's from once you open it, so you don't get the real tracking info! Should be there Friday or Saturday! Happy Festivus!

Ok, John. This is headed your way. The postal elf told me 3-7 days, but also to take into account Corona and Christmas. You can follow the elves' progress with RC596086035CH. Hope you have a Merry Christmas and great New Year.

HOHOHOLY SHIT! USPS messed up your last label, so here is another one 9405503699300187913826 Lets hope this one works a little better 😊

Ive got a feeling my elves may be dropping yours off a little early (Friday, Dec 18th). Tracking number is 915375859247 (FedEx). Since you have been naughty anyway this year, go ahead and rip into it. I hope you find a few items that I picked out to be "tasty". I even included a few...

Well here we go Ben, I am on my way. I told you I have what you want, and I wasn't playin'. Sit tight and open up that chimney flue, I'm on my way. 9405 5036 9930 0187 6123 92

Another tracking for you - UPS 1ZRF33990338608182 Added another : UPS: 1Z2AF928YW71962907

9405503699300186532677 - And no peaking on the tracker for this. For sure there is coal in this package. But it ain't all bad. I hope USPS gets this to you in time for your return but based on how @CigSid's luck has been with overseas packages, it may not surface until 2024. Merry...

Ok Santa has had some setbacks, let's just say the USPS is definitely on the naughty list this year. Lol I have two things I hope you love getting delivered to me Thursday and Friday. So you package will be shipping a little late.

Im dying here!

Ho Ho Ho I will drop your gift off tomorrow afternoon. Merry Christmas 🎄

The Big Brown Truck seems to have arrived. If anyone is needing Mr. Thoughts for the next few hours, you'll need to either join in or leave him alone.

Hey, I didn't post that tracking info above! Who the hell is the imposter? There must be a few Santa's, stalking this thread. Anyway, I have a few other things heading your way as well Cody. Be prepared and ready, I'll follow up when I have some tracking info.

Santa was going to ask you what you want but i really don't give a shit.... HEADS UP BITCH! 9405503699300179080239 HOHOHO S.C.

Santa has had one to many IPAs trying to plan what to send you. I hope this box of shit is something you may like.... 9405503699300179080178 Cheers, Santa!

So, young fella, your package is on the way!! If it smells like a barnyard, well you know why 😂 Santa hopes you enjoy his package as much as Mrs Claus does hahahahohohoho! Oh, and this number might help: 9405503699300179078137

Pug, Keep a watch for my handy helpers USPS. Hope you fell well soon. 9405503699300179080277 HO HO HO Santa

Well, now I'm stuck at the fucking ER (everyone is fine, reindeer suicide attempt, it happens this time of year with all the stress). Still hopeful to get it out tomorrow, but wanted to give you a heads up.

Ho Ho Ho Oh no... well as expected USPS is running behind! No fault of theirs I assume, the whole world is flinging packages around right now like its Christmas or something.. Don't fret little sugar plum, they assure me you'll get what's coming to you, just later than expected.