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Merry Christmas 🎄 Hope you and your family have a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Years.

So happy to hear you liked your package! Merry Christmas Brother!!

Santa, you visited in such a generous way today I am just pleased as peas in cornbread. The Mrs. was happy, I was happy and that sum-of-gun Fidel even smiled. There was something for everyone and extras a plenty, very tastefully selected so that even the forest ushered a pleasing hum. Your...

Well good golly, it’s delivered!!

HO HO HO! So glad everything made it safely. Please give the kids a few of those treats for me and keep warm with a little Kentucky hug, yourself. Merry Christmas!

Big "V", Happy Birthday to ya.

Happy Birthday brother.

Soooooooooo I think I am putting the entire post office on the naughty list! Sorry this is taking so long Greg, but it will be worth the wait!

It came up for air! Probably not tomorrow then, though...

Alright, enough of this nice guy banter. I'm BACK! OK Smelly, your gift is on the way as I used the USPS elves out of my Summer residence in North Pole, Alaska. It's scheduled to arrive on Christmas Eve as long as they get their shit together and stop drinking their spiked eggnog all day. As for...

Ho Ho Ho. Just checking in again Brandon. Santa hasn’t forgotten about you. Mrs. Claus sent me a video of the postal situation in Ohio right now. What a mess. Coal for all of them!! One of the elves also told me some packages have been delivered but the tracking still shows ‘in transit’. If you...

Maybe tomorrow? 🤞

Hopefully tomorrow!!

Well big surprise, my reindeer must be all goofed up on skunkweed and dropped the ball on getting your package delivered on time! Looks like it's on it's way, maybe, as it's been scanned in since the 15th and still moving from facility to facility within the same town...

Ok the package is packed up and will be on its way monday since apparently the post off is only open for 2 hours on Saturday really WTF. There will be a follow-up package with last gift since USPS SUCKS!!!!!!! And it is in the its late but on its way category. I hope this first package makes...

Your item is out for delivery on December 19, 2020 at 6:10 am in CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA 22911. USPS expects to deliver your package today by 9:00pm. The second package hasn’t moved since middle of the week. I am sure it’s coming still but no idea when.

If you’re talking about me... believe me, that’s not fish on my breath, if you know what I mean 😂 And for you my child @Acclaym, the reindeer just texted me with this message:

Amsterdam baby! You have to visit Amsterdam.......

Glad you like the package Matt. Enjoy the socks and be glad I couldn't find any xmas themed underwear!

Ok got the one awesome item and waiting on last awesome item and god willing it will come today. If not I will mail everything out tomorrow and send it separately. Definitely lots of coal for USPS this year.