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  1. Secret Santa

    drunkfish3

    Chester, I haven't forgotten about you. Waiting on one more thing I have to go pick up today, and then your package will fly tomorrow.
  2. Secret Santa

    Looking for a Conman...crap, I mean ConDaddy!

    Steven, my lad! I've got your package in my han.... wait a minute... I mean... I've got a package all ready to go for you! Make sure your chimney is clear! Enjoy your holiday! Tracking Santy Claus
  3. Secret Santa

    Yo yo yo Brickhouse....

    Ho ho ho...the elves tell me a package is on the way via my special helpers at fed ex! 781312125538
  4. Secret Santa

    Gonz Come Sit On Santa’s Lap

    @Gonz sorry to inform you that a few of my reindeer have come down with Covid and had to be quarantined, which leaves me with little options on delivering your gifts. I could use the USPS but you may not get your gifts until 2021 at the rate they are going, so I decided to put them on a big...
  5. Secret Santa

    Hey Twine, er THinde.

    Hohoho! I'm grateful something arrived before the mail system gets all clogged up! But remember, it is hockey season up here in the tundra. Hat tricks are bound to happen! Hohoho! Merry Christmas!
  6. Secret Santa

    HO HO HOOOOO!!! C'MERE H.Vachon

    HO! HO! HO OOOOO!!!! I'm snowed in!! But thankfully for you I offered a USPS delivery person some fine cigars and bourbon. After getting his ass good and drunk he offered to take you package. Don't you worry your precious Gurkhas are safe! Now back to whipping elves and spanking Mrs Clause...
  7. Secret Santa

    Kann

    Smart ass, huh? Well I may have just lost the auction for your Ferrari SF1000. Bummer. Well the good news is that now you’re package is ready to ship. Just got to find a bigger box for the additional coal I’m sending now.
  8. Secret Santa

    Kann

    @kann your package is one component shy of being ready to ship. I am going to send it out on the 15th though because I am trying to time it on your return from wherever your going. I’m trying to take care of you but you gotta get all needy with your vacation schedule and all. Next year make my...
  9. Secret Santa

    Matt R, Matt R, Matt R U ready for some Santa love?

    Ok, we're back in session! Xmas should hit you sometime the middle of next week.
  10. Secret Santa

    HO HO HO Cabaiguan Jaun

    HO HO HO Mr. Elliott. I think the elves have done a decent job of getting some holiday cheer prepared for you and your family. The reindeer even insisted that your treat begging dog be included in the holiday fun. My tour of the Gurkha factory last week really helped give me some ideas to...
  11. Secret Santa

    Investandprosper, get over here.

    That all sounds good and I hope to have this out tomorrow. Mrs. Claus asked about anyone else in your house and if there is anything we could send their way as well. If we send some edible things anything not allowed in Hawaii or allergies/ hates you have?
  12. Secret Santa

    I've got THOUGHTS

    We seem to have a lot in common. Your wife has two complaints about me too. One. I've got an amazing tongue. 2. I have an amazing tongue. Watch for the brown truck guy on Monday, I've got other people's wives to bang. I can't be doing all this shit on my own.
  13. Secret Santa

    Awww Hells Bell’s, @cgardan’s on some list

    Although I may not have 'exactly' what you're looking for (Chad has the male model already, sorry), I still have a few blowup options I am sending your way. Gonna be honest though, wasn't easy getting these things in a box. Let's just say be easy with opening or they are gonna pop right out...
  14. Secret Santa

    Lets go big boy @TexasTraveler!! Its time to wrastle texas style!!!!

    Little boy little boy your package is on the way! I hope my elves make you happy to end the crazy year that we have had. Unfortunately my reindeer refused to enter the state of Texas. However, we were able to find some well armed postal workers that seemed right at home within your great...
  15. Secret Santa

    Voodoo Man PaulTra

    Santa is in a good mood today . So he is on his way to see you Paul. Just stole the USPS delivery truck so hoping it wont break down as I am going 25 MPH - its speed limit HOHOHO Well watch out for my license plate 9405511202555881282898
  16. Secret Santa

    Wingman1974 What do it be?

    So who would know amidst all this snow That Rudolf is a union leader He's cornered Comet, Dasher, Donner and Blitzen And this union crap has my sleigh in the shitzen Santa can't fly, Covid immune or not This reindeer union has Santa's sleigh in a knot So its off I go to the postal depot With...
  17. Secret Santa

    Looking for a Conman...crap, I mean ConDaddy!

    Well Steve, if I am reading things correctly, I'm seeing get your wife all the things and you nothing! I think I can do that. Stay tuned! 😄
  18. Secret Santa

    drunkfish3

    OK Chester, what kind of things are 8-9 and 11-12 year old boys and girls into these days? Wait, is that creepy?
  19. Secret Santa

    MERRY CHRISTMAS BREEDY

    @Breedy I hope this package brings you as much joy as it brought me! Stay safe and behave yourself! MEEERRRRRRYYYYYYYYYY CHRIIIIIIISSTMASSSSSSS!!! HO HO HO 🎄🎄🎄 9405503699300164019527
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